When we have peace of mind, we are not in an adversarial
relationship with our lives and ourselves. When we can know and feel we can
handle our daily life free of anxiety, we are confident. Thus, we like and
Many people feel comfortable in some situations and uncomfortable in others. Do you feel good about yourself wherever you are and with whomever you come in contact? Or are there some situations where you wish you felt more confident? If your answer to the latter is yes, you want to read ‘Why Choose High Self-Esteem,’ the first chapter of my book, Build Self-Esteem.
This chapter on ‘Why Choose High Self-Esteem’ explains why self-esteem is important to all areas of one’s life. In addition, the references and explanation given help people to see that having healthy self-esteem is good. Thus, they choose to make the decision to gain greater self-esteem.
When you were a child growing up, did your mother or father wake you up by gently shaking you and saying, “Rise up and Shine.”? If so, you probably knew that meant to pay attention to your teacher today, make good grades, and don’t get in trouble. So, you learned it meant, “Do your best.”
We want to know and feel we can reach our desired goals, express our opinions, and handle criticism, conflict and difficult situations to feel okay.
The negative feedback, verbal or nonverbal, one receives from parents, teachers, and peers, growing up sets the stage for feelings of adequacy. If a person receives put-downs or negative nonverbal, when she or he asks questions or gives his opinion, more than likely, the person experiences self-doubt. Thus, he experiences feelings of “not enough” and “not good enough.” Whether the person stops participating or speaking up in groups depends on the severity and consistency of the put-downs.
Assertiveness is a powerful form of communication that you can you can use to take care of yourself while building positive relationships. If you use it correctly and appropriately on a regular basis, you build self-esteem to the degree that you:
Express your needs and wants.
If you ask for what you want using assertiveness, you are telling the other person, “I count” or “I matter.” Doing so is giving yourself respect. If the other person honors your request, you enhance your self-respect even more.
Self-Reliance is knowing you can stand on your own two feet. It is listening to your inner guidance or nudges, etc., rather than to others or external factors. When you are self-reliant, you believe you can do what you need to become successful and take care of yourself. Then, self-reliance is an essential component for developing high self-esteem and confidence.
Self-esteem is the reputation one holds with oneself. It is appreciating one’s worth and feeling satisfied with who you are.
In addition, it is the main factor that influences one’s success. Maslow’s hierarchy of basic human needs and motivations indicates that it is essential that people gain self-esteem to be their best self, to reach their full potential, and achieve at the highest level.
To accept yourself is to love yourself. It is self-caring or being empathetic to yourself. It is nourishing yourself. To accept yourself, let go of the following:
Comparison and Competition
Focus on your accomplishments and their value to accept yourself. When you do, you will see the value and power of your strengths, and thus know your value. You will not need to compare yourself to others. You will compete with yourself. You will have less stress