by Dorothy Wehunt
“A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval,” said Mark Twain. (Awaken the Greatness Within, 2015-2020. Accessed January 17, 2021. https://www.awakenthegreatnesswithin.com/35-inspirational-quotes-on-approval/
If you are reading this, that means you want to know how to approve of yourself. And to continue to read might be a way to start to approve of yourself.
To approve of yourself is different from to accept yourself. Acceptance of self is accepting your flaws and your good points. Yes, it is important to acknowledge your flaws. Doing so let you know how to protect yourself from vulnerability. They let you know how you can improve and become your best self.
Yet, many people dismiss or ignore the positives and focus on the negatives. How can a person improve the negatives to become her or his best self if they discount the positive? And this undermines one’s belief in one’s ability and confidence. Thus, it undermines self-improvement. It undermines setting goals and achievement.
Approval of Self
Louise Hay said, “You’ve been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.” (Succeed Feed, 2020, Accessed January 21, 2021. 99 Louise Hay Quotes That Will Change Your Life | Succeed Feed)
Look for the good for how to approve of yourself.
To approve of self means you make a point to look for the good in you. Or the good things about you. This puts you into a “yes” attitude about yourself. As you do, you feel the good and the satisfaction.
What Socrates said might be advice one want to consider also to approve of self. “To find yourself, think for yourself. Socrates.” (Goodreads, 2021. Accessed January 21, 2021. Socrates (Author of Apología de Sócrates) (goodreads.com)
It has been proven that the following ways below can help a person to find and focus on her or his good. Thus, you may want the consider them.
What do you do in your role at work? Look at how what you do helps the company to have success? And helps another person to succeed at his or her job.
Acknowledge how your income from your job helps your family. Moreover, how does what you do help your self-esteem and you personally. You want to notice what qualities, talents, and abilities allow you to do these.
And look at what you do in other roles. Volunteering at church. Or an organization? At home?
Focus on the good in you and approve of yourself.
To approve of self, one focuses on the positives. Thus, you may want to make the positives or the good about you more important to you in your mind than the negatives. One way to do this is to look for examples of the good. This verifies it to you. The more examples you find the more you buy into their value. Therefore, you want to make a point to find examples in all areas of life. Work, home, church, etc. The more examples you discover, the more you value the positives.
Acknowledge Your Mental Being.
To see the good in you, you think. Thus, you are a mental being. And acknowledge you can do. Doing and thinking go “hand in hand’. Then, the ability to think and to do is a positive and a good thing, isn’t it?
Highlight your good to you and approve of self.
Louise Hay said, “Don’t affirm the negative if you want a positive outcome.” (81 Incredible Quote and World of Encouragement, 2021. Accessed January 21, 2021. 81 Incredible Quotes and Words of Encouragement | Spirit Button)
Then, you want to compliment your positives to approve of you, don’t you? Also, affirm the benefits you or others receive from the what you do.
And she said, “You are the only person who thinks in your mind! You are the power and authority in your world.” (Succeed Feed, 2020. Accessed January 21, 2021. 99 Louise Hay Quotes That Will Change Your Life | Succeed Feed)
So, you may want to make statements to give yourself to reinforce the good you do and do for others. And the qualities and talents that help you to do them.
Why and How to Reinforce
If a person compliments another on what she or he does not value, the compliment loses its meaning. A coworker shared once that a woman said to her, “You have such beautiful eyebrows.” She said she responded, “Thank you.” Yet, she thought, “Hell, who cares about eyebrows when I look like a blimp and am on a diet to lose weight.”
But if a person compliments you on something you value, you value the compliment, don’t you? And the more you value what a person compliments you on, the more you value the compliment. Then, the more you highlight what you value the most, the more you will approve of yourself, do you agree?
Something you might want ask yourself is, “What do I wish others would give me more compliments on? Or things about you that you value the most or consider most important?
When a person begins to develop qualities and skills to reinforce her or his good, she or he approves of self.
Are you ready to approve of yourself to live the life you deserve and be happy? If you would like proven and techniques and strategies to help you, read Build Self-Esteem.
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